Standing In Line

I’m standing in line. It’s a long line. It winds around the street. I’m somewhere near the back, but in time I won’t be. That’s how lines work.

The people in front and the people behind are a jumble sale, there is no order or sense to any of it. We’re all jumbled together in line and after five minutes the jumble takes a step. Someone is reading On The Road. Someone is scratching their armpits. It’s hot.

After some time I forget what the line is actually for, all my thoughts have left to join another line somewhere. Bagels.

A Stuffy Alien

I speak through my nose to strangers. Each word comes out like a low hum, can you make me out through the mumble? I often repeat myself multiple times but still, they look at me like my mouth is full of bees.

I tried to copy the people who came before me but I took the wrong lessons. No one really does the chicken walk, when was the last time you received a response via thumbs up? What’s that? I can’t hear you. Maybe open that mouth a little more, let the bees out.

We go through this every day.

And So… Got To Get More Serious

I thought I saw an old colleague in the falafel wrap shop. I said hi. They said… nothing. Of course.

Someone said ‘I like you a lot, you know?’ Did I?

At a BBQ I talked to a guy for twenty minutes about the film Dune. He thought I was talking about Doom.

Empty frames in the corridor. ‘What are you going to fill them with?’

‘I like them just how they are.’

There always has to be a you. Without you what would the people do?

‘You know that guy with curly hair?’

Always the guy with curly hair.

An Assortment

On the way home the usual crossing had a large lorry turning, blocking the road for any incoming traffic. I waltzed across with ease and a woman behind me did the same. ‘That was an easy cross today, wasn’t it?’

‘Yeah, it certainly was.’ I’m not sure if they were talking to me. I turned back to see the road now packed with cars, the lorry was no longer a blocking point.

When I got back to the flat I sat down and let the brief conversation float around in my head. ‘Yeah, it certainly was.’ The lorry burst through.

Well Well

An art exhibition had a television in the corner of the room. It was emitting peaceful noises of nature, birds chirping and wind softly blowing. It helped create a peaceful atmosphere and allowed myself to enjoy the blue clay sculptures dotted around the room even more than I would in complete silence. On my way out I took a look at the television screen to see what was on display alongside the sounds and all that played was a well situated in the distance. I shivered and quickly left. Nothing good ever comes of wells, especially when they’re on TV.

Main

He sat down next to me and started talking into my ear. It was a nightclub, you have to whisper away everything that makes sense in such an environment.

‘Do you ever see yourself as the main character in life? It’s a syndrome.’

I looked around the club and thought about it. I saw crowds of dancers all doing different dances, and someone spilled their drink. The music was loud and I couldn’t quite put together an answer that a main character would say.

‘But if I’m the main character and you’re the main character, how does that work?’

Dance.

Loss Of S

‘When did you start to lose yourself?’

I don’t know, you tell me?

‘When did you start to lose yourself?’

I’m sorry, I wasn’t listening.

‘When did you start to lose yourself?’

I had a daydream about a man running off a building and floating off into the sky.

‘When did you start to lose yourself?

Sometimes I stand in the middle of my living room and talk to myself about how my day will go.

‘When did you start to lose yourself?

Did you know there are only 40 calories in a single Jaffa Cake?

‘Never mind, forget it.’

Eye Trails Everywhere

I caught a guy’s eyes darting all over the shop. He saw me and nervously laughed.

‘You know all those little lines and dots you get in your eyes? Eye floaters I think they’re called. I woke up with a whole host of them living in my right eye and I can’t stop trying to follow them. It feels like I’m following a trail they’re leaving me and if I catch up to them they’ll disappear.’

‘I have them too.’ I said, and off he went. A few moments later I heard the screeching of traffic and a crunch. Trails.

When DId I

When did I stop believing in myself?

Was it when a pair of policemen stopped me in the street and asked me to tie my shoelaces?

That happened a long time ago.

Was it when I tripped and fell after attempting to catch a bus? The passengers all laughed as they watched me cry.

That was before the loss.

Maybe it was when I stepped in dog shit and dragged it through the classroom?

Don’t make me relive those teenage years.

Recently I paid £3.20 for a coffee and drank it cold.

That would do it. But just who knows?

April Showers

To replicate April at any other time of the year, simply place a clear plastic shopping bag in front of your eyes and look at the sky. This is what April looks like to me most of the time.

You can enhance the experience by taking it out on a rainy day and feeling the drips hit. I have a dent in my head so after a heavy rainfall I find myself with a lake up there, the pigeons love it.

And even indoors everything feels blurred. Too many Easter eggs? Or a clear plastic bag over my head? Spring.