End of Year Review

It’s the final day of the year, so get to a sink and fill it with warm water. Not too cold, not too hot, it has to be something you can easily relax your face within. Stick it right in so you can’t breathe, and start thinking about it all.

All the bad stuff

All the embarrassing moments

All the failed promises

All those wasted moments

Think of them all without pulling yourself out of the water, and once you have, stand up and breathe once more. All those things will now be mingling with the dirt from your face in the water. Pull the plug and watch it drain away.

If you have a lot of things to think about, let’s hope you can hole your breath…


Dancing Panda


They say the dancing panda dances to the sun, but this doesn’t seem to be the case. The dancing panda requires something more.

It dances to the beat of a head banging against a wall, the rhythm of a fist falling into skin.

It dances to the sound of a scream, the smack of a slap.

It dances when it sees red, when it sees blue.

But the sun? No, it doesn’t dance to that.

Rules of the Season


Eat too much


Complain about being sick


Drink too much


Not drink


laugh as loud as possible


Sit in the corner and read


Let out your racism


Counter drunken politics


Talk about work


Talk about being unemployed


Make New Year vows


Sit and offer up nothing

So do be someone else

and don’t let those emotions run wild

unless they involve tight hugs and cider flavoured tears of love

Happy holidays.

Eternal Christmas Greeting

To everybody and nobody, a Merry Christmas to you all.

If you got everything you wanted that’s great, if not, that’s also great.

There will be plenty to eat until there isn’t and too much to drink until it’s no longer Christmas.

So smile or sulk , whatever makes Christmas so Christmas to you.

This can now be used every Christmas, it’s an eternal Christmas greeting!