Adult Entertainment

How many pills does it take to be whole?

When you’re better?
When you’re full?
When you’re having fun?

It’s just some adult entertainment.
Don’t go and ruin the fun.


Knife Ad


This Slaughterhouse knife is a real great product, I stabbed five bears on the way here, and it’s still sharp and sparkly! You too can enjoy the great wildlife with a Slaughterhouse knife, yours for only £24.99, and if you order today, you’ll also receive a free litter picker to help protect the environment! Call 0111 397 652 now!’
‘What, five bears? I got to get me one of them! Maybe I can use it to strum my guitar too…’

Push It

I push it up a level
I push it over
I push it into the sea
I push the waves
and they always come back to me.

I push too soft
to make things happen
and nothing happens
I push too hard
because things don’t happen
And they always come back to me.

I push for the future
I push my fists against the wall
I push my face into a mirror
I push my head against the floor
I pushed her off a bridge
But she didn’t come back to me.

Channel Static’s (Nintendo) Games of 2014

Sometimes there just isn’t enough time in the year to jump from console to console, so here are the top five Nintendo titles of 2014, featuring murder, romance, jelly, fisticuffs and floating through space. Not all the same game, wouldn’t that be something?

5. Hyrule Warriors


Hacking away at countless enemies is a joy when the days are long and the work is rough. Bad day? Switch off and go off on a rampage! Continue reading

Where Is His Family At A Time Like This?

Where Is His Family At A Time Like This?

(I Don’t Know, I Can’t Get Through To Anybody.)

(Poor Sucker)

(Poor Soul)

(When are you free?)

By Channel Static

People eat. People think. People cry. People fuck. People fight. People sink. People dream. People play. People drink. People need. People read. People listen. People watch. People dance. People lie. People work. People learn, People argue. People smile. People laugh. People try.

People do this everyday.

And will be doing it