What Am I?

Swollen cheeks, dried blood down the side, baggy eyes, chewed up gums, torn out hair, smells off porridge, tastes of soap.

Sometimes smiles if you tickle them. Sometimes cries if you tickle them. Sometimes screams if you belittle them. I mean tickle them.

What am I?

Just a regular kind of guy. Right?


Sayings To Put On Signs In The House

Stick these on your walls, cushions, calendars, and mugs, with stars, stripes and rainbows. 2018, let’s go!:

I’ll Get Back To You On That One

Yeah I’d love to meet up again. Just note that if you ask me, I’ll always be busy.

That sounds great, let’s do it! Just remind me to ghost you when you actually give me a date. Courtesy. Continue reading

Make It Festive

Stuff glitter into an eviction letter envelope
Stick Santa hats on the homeless for the papers
Strap fairy lights around each dilapidated building
Sing Christmas songs to your shadow every morning
Slip in a Merry when you hurt all those around you
Sink in that sherry when the past comes back to haunt you
Sculpt a snowman from the shit of winter victims

Make it festive, make it right
Hear a jingle, let’s all mingle
It’s the Christmas spirit
Depression, grief, misfortune
They mean nothing with a good old ‘ho ho ho’

Merry Merry Christmas, to one and all.